A Day in the Life of a Missionary Kid

Our kids love Kenya.  They definitely still talk about Michigan and Minnesota, but this is home now because that's just how little kids are - their whole world revolves around the present.  Our life is so different here, but our kids are adaptable and have found wonderful new things to love about our life here while also being anchored in the familiar routines we've always had - playing, eating PBJ sandwiches, playing, napping, and playing some more.

We've officially been in Kenya for five months, and it's amazing to realize how much our kids have grown in that short amount of time.  Little kids change quickly anyway, but our kids in particular have undergone a lot of change and development as they've experienced new people and new places within a new culture.  We've had so many conversations with them about what they're experiencing and routinely attempt to help them understand things that are beyond their comprehension!

So, without further ado, here are multiple snapshots of our three little MKs: Caleb, Kai, and Asa.


Crazy About Chameleons
Chameleons are everywhere around here, and all the MKs take joy in finding them and watching them eat flies.  Caleb and Kai absolutely love these little guys!

The Waterfall
Tenwek's electricity is provided by a hydroelectric dam placed in the Mara River, which is down the hill from the hospital.  The boys love to walk to the waterfall and throw rocks in.  This particular picture was taken during the dry season.  The water really roars during the rainy season!

Homeschool

I work through a preschool curriculum with Caleb and Kai about 2-3 times a week.  We work on letters and numbers, plus a bunch of concepts.  Every so often I'll pull together a craft or hands-on activity to go along with the curriculum.  The boys love when it's time for "a lesson."

Exploring Outside
Tenwek is the Land of Eternal Spring, as we like to say around here.  The weather is virtually perfect all the time: sunny and mid-70s during the day (with some rain during the rainy seasons), and down in the 50s overnight.  All that to say, it's a great place to be outside!

The Garden
We have an amazing garden right behind our house.  We share it with a couple other families and have been growing things like lettuce and green beans and zucchini.  The boys love helping us pick green beans, and also love to help water the garden.  It's the first time we've ever had a garden, and we're particularly grateful since some things (like lettuce) cannot be found anywhere around here unless you grow it yourself.

The Balcony
We live on the second floor of a 5-plex building and have a great balcony with locking gates on either end.  It's perfect for sitting outside and reading a book while remaining within earshot of napping kids.  It's also great for being outside with said kids while also keeping them contained!

Safari
We live less than three hours away from Maasai Mara, one of the most popular places to go on safari in all of Kenya.  We've been twice already, once just for a day trip and once to stay overnight during the Great Wildebeest Migration this past month.  It was amazing!  When you live this close to one of God's greatest creations, it's imperative to take advantage of it!  The boys talk about safari a lot.  Caleb's recent repeated phrase is, "I can't believe we saw the big cats!"

Nairobi
We've gone into Nairobi a few times for supplies and to get a break from the hospital.  Usually we try to do something fun in the midst of our supply run, like taking the kids to the Giraffe Center to feed giraffes or taking Caleb to the Snake Park at the Nairobi National Museum, or simply eating chicken nuggets at KFC.

Betty and Ebenezer
Betty is one of our househelpers, and she and Asa became fast friends.  She adores him and he adores her!  Betty's son is named Ebenezer, and he's the same age as Kai.  Caleb, Kai and Ebenezer can often be seen chasing each other around the house or finding trouble outside.  Even though Ebenezer barely speaks English and our kids don't speak any Kipsigis or Swahili, they play together really well.  And Ebenezer loves Eli too!  He quickly learned from our own kids that when Daddy comes home for lunch it's time to run and jump into his arms.  All three of them do it every time Eli walks in the door!

Trips to the Hospital
All three boys have been up to the hospital exactly once.  Asa was the first, with a weight check when he turned 9 months old.  They still use an old-fashioned scale here, and Asa had fun hanging out and getting weighed!  Caleb was next, so Eli could check his ears with an otoscope for a suspected ear infection.  He was excited to go because I said he'd earn a sticker on his Culture Chart for it.  (Caleb and Kai each have a sticker chart for having new cultural experiences.  We've discovered that it helps to motivate them and keep them brave when they're nervous about new things here.)  And lastly, Kai made his debut trip to the hospital for an x-ray, which thankfully showed no broken bones after he jumped out of a tree and injured his foot and was limping around for over a day.  After the x-ray was done, he proudly claimed, "I did a good job working at the hospital!"

MK Tie-Dye Day
Another missionary family hosted an event for all the MKs to do tie-dye T-shirts.  It was a blast!  In the end I had to do all of our kids' shirts for them, but they loved the end-product and proudly wear their shirts with all the other MKs here at Tenwek.

Crazy About Chameleons, Part 2
These creatures really are everywhere around here, and our kids really do love them!

Cooking from scratch
Most of our cooking has to be done from scratch, and occasionally I let the kids help me.  They love to stir and taste test and make an absolute mess!  But they're learning a ton about cooking, which is a good thing.

Madison
There's a 12-year old MK that lives below us and she quickly became a very important part of our life.  Madison officially babysits the boys once a week for me, and unofficially helps out in all manner of ways the rest of the week.  She is amazing and our kids absolutely adore her!  In fact, Caleb has a complete crush on her.  He talks about her when she's not here, he gets shy but excited whenever she comes over, and he boldly declares, "Mom, I reeeaaallly like Madison."  She's like a part of our family.  I honestly don't know what we'd do without her!

Solar Eclipse

Just this morning there was a partial solar eclipse that could be seen from East Africa, and we joined all the other MKs for "science class" and saw the phenomenon through special glasses.  Another mom made donuts for the occasion and it was great fun to see all the kids admire the moon blocking the sun.  Caleb never actually looked through the glasses, and Kai wouldn't do it more than once, but they've been talking about it all day, so clearly the event made an impression!

These kinds of things cement the MK experience - learning and exploring and playing together in a unique setting, and watching them help each other and love each other through it all.  These kids are living a unique but extraordinary life, and we're excited to see how our own kids will grow and develop continually through their own journey as an MK.

Why It's Worth It

Last month I was asked to write an article for the upcoming issue of The Call (a WGM publication) about the question, "Why is it worth it?"  I'd been piecing the article together in my mind for awhile but didn't get a chance to sit down and write it until today, the due date.  There's nothing like last-minute motivation!  It's just a short piece, but I wanted to share it here.  These have definitely been thoughts/issues we've been reflecting on regularly since arriving in Kenya nearly five months ago.

Why It's Worth It

            We’d been in Kenya just over two months when I uttered the words, “I want to go home.”  They were spoken not with a murmur or sigh, but with an emphatic sob.  After more than a decade of preparing for the mission field, it was jarring to feel such negative emotions after finally getting here.  But the transition to living overseas was harder than we expected.  The daily grind of learning the culture and adjusting to ministry and helping our three young boys adapt had taken its toll.
            The straw that broke the camel’s back was a missing dump truck – a missing toy dump truck.  Our son’s cherished toy was a small and seemingly insignificant thing, yet its disappearance tipped the scales and I found myself sobbing for the comfort of home.  It had “walked off” with another kid, meaning that a Kenyan playing in the sandbox with Kai had either mistakenly lost it or outright absconded with it, both of which were known to happen.  When Kai asked where his dump truck was, and when a thorough search produced no results, and when reality hit that I couldn’t run to Target and replace the construction machine that someone else lost, I broke down.  It was simply too much to handle.  Processing the value of material things, plus wrestling with the socially acceptable activity of walking off with someone else’s stuff, plus helping a 2-year old cope with the loss of a beloved toy, plus weighing the merits of justice vs honor/shame when face-to-face with the culprit…it was all too much to handle that day and I just wanted to go home.
            But rather than give up and actually go home, we are allowing God to use this time of transition and stress to refine us and strengthen us for the years ahead.  When Eli struggles with the death of yet another patient, God reminds him that He is faithful even in the midst of death.  When I realize I’ve made yet another cultural mistake, God reminds me that He is sovereign and can do His work despite my faux pas.  When our kids cling to timidity in this new culture, God reminds us that He is wise and has brought them here to grow in confidence.
            Living and ministering overseas is not easy, and it’s clearly not the easiest way to raise our children either.  But it’s the best thing we could be doing because it is God’s will for us.  Being in the center of God’s will is worth every stress, every lost dump truck, and every desire to go home.  He is worth it all, now and forever.

Because There's Hope in Jesus

A young man was brought into the hospital by his family.  They had found him after an attempted suicide by drinking pesticides, a common form of suicide here due to its accessibility and affordability.  The man was apparently involved in a dysfunctional relationship, which the family disapproved of, and seeing no way out of his predicament he therefore decided the best solution was to end his life.  That was the story of this despondent young man's story when Eli first met him in the ER at the hospital.  Thankfully, his attempted suicide did not succeed.  And thankfully, his story was about to take an incredible turn.

After resuming consciousness, it was obvious this man held little hope for whatever lay ahead.  His face was drawn, his posture limp, his eyes weary.  He had hoped to escape his life, not return to it.  Being rescued from death, it seemed, was not good news.  Eli was concerned for this patient, wondering if he'd be discharged only to make another attempt to destroy his own life.

But later that day the young man was visited by a hospital chaplain, a kind Kenyan man committed to nurturing the spiritual needs of patients.  That chaplain boldly but lovingly shared the Gospel of Jesus Christ, the Good News, and it was a turning point for this young man.  What he heard was a story of love and grace and hope that could be infused into his own story and alter it for the better forevermore.  The man decided to believe in the saving grace of Jesus, and the change was instantaneous.  Eli showed up the next day and could scarcely believe it was the same man he'd seen the day before.  It was obvious this man held great hope for whatever lay ahead.  His face was glowing, his posture confident, his eyes joyful.  He had hoped to escape his life, but was now thankful he'd failed the venture.  Being rescued from death, it seemed, was suddenly good news.  Being rescued from Death was even greater news!  The young man's life was outwardly transformed because of the inward transformation done through the grace of Jesus Christ.

The man was eventually discharged and went home to a life with circumstances that looked much like they had before, but he went home with the ability to perceive those circumstances differently if not change those circumstances altogether.  Because when Jesus enters a life there is hope.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace 

as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope 

by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Romans 15:13

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A girl, maybe 13 or 14 years old, was brought into the Maternal and Child Health clinic.  She wasn't performing well in school, her mother said, and despite moving her around from school to school her academics weren't improving.  They came to Tenwek to see if anything could be done to help her.

The staff at MCH called Eli to assess the girl.  Probable causes for her poor performance ran through his head as he walked toward the building.  Did she need IQ testing?  Was her vision okay?  As Eli met with the girl and her mother, however, it quickly became apparent that her issues were not clinical/physical, but social and emotional.  She was a social outcast at school and was being bullied and was struggling with low self-esteem.  No wonder her grades were suffering.  But what was to be done?  A prescription or procedure wouldn't solve her problems.

A Clinical Officer (the equivalent of a Nurse Practitioner) volunteered to do a more thorough counseling session the next day, and during that time she shared the Gospel with the girl, who chose to accept it.  The girl went home, not with a promise that her school situation would automatically improve but with a promise that Jesus would walk with her every step of the way.  She now has Someone to turn to when other kids at school shun her.  She now has Someone to believe in who holds her future in the palm of His hand.  She now has Someone to cling to for hope.  Because when Jesus enters a life there is hope.

"This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance 

(and for this we labor and strive), 

that we have put our hope in the living God, 

who is the Savior of all men, 

and especially of those who believe."

1 Timothy 4:9-10


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It is a blessing and honor to be part of something that helps turn stories of despair into stories of hope. It's a true joy to know that the ministry of Tenwek Hospital, the ministry we are presently fully invested in, is sharing the hope of Jesus Christ with the people who come here seeking help.  May His name be made known among the nations, including the nation of Kenya, and may He be continually glorified through the small role we play in making Him known.

Counting the Cost

In the story of the Rich Young Man (Matthew 19:16-30) we are challenged to count the cost of following Jesus.  For the eponymous character in the story, the cost was to sell all his possessions and give them to the poor.  "Then come, follow me," Jesus instructed him.  But the man went away sad because he had great wealth.  The cost of following Jesus was too much for him.

At least, we assume it was too much for him.  The story doesn't indicate that he ever did sell his possessions and give them to the poor and then follow Jesus.  The rich young man went away from that encounter with sadness, which indicates that he went away from that encounter with no intention of coming back.  But I'd like to believe that some people, maybe even the rich young man included, initially went away sad at the thought of the sacrifice required to follow Jesus, but upon counting the cost decided to follow Jesus anyway.  It's certainly not everyone's first reaction to jump for joy after counting the cost.  In fact, I'm inclined to think that most of us (myself included) are weighed down with a degree of sadness when we truly realize how much sacrifice is required of us.  I'd also like to think that despite our tears and hanging heads and outright sorrow, Jesus is still pleased when we choose to follow Him anyway because a willing heart is a heart that's able to be transformed to all He wants it to become, which is the ultimate reason for following Jesus anyway.

Here is my honest confession: I had a Rich Young Man moment right before we came to Kenya.  It was Easter weekend, two days before our departure.  We had traveled across the state of Michigan to spend the day with my dad's family and I knew it would be a day of mixed emotions.  My family was excited for us to be on our way, but also sad to let us go, and I knew it'd be particularly hard because of one final goodbye: my grandpa.  My Grandpa Clark was 90 years old and his health had been rapidly declining for awhile and I simply knew that once I said goodbye I would never see him again.  I kissed his cheek and said "I love you" and subsequently threw myself into my cousin's arms and wept.  Let me tell you, in that moment my heart understood what the rich young man felt like.  My wealth was not in material possessions like his, but I am incredibly rich in the blessing of my family and I counted the cost that day and felt an immense sadness at what is being required of us.  Jesus has asked us to give up the proximity of family and the opportunities for family gatherings and the joy of making memories with them.  And after all this He said, "Then come, follow me."

And we did.  We followed Jesus all the way to Kenya, where He's been busy molding us and teaching us and stretching us and transforming us.  I do not regret following Him, and I never will.  But yes, I got on the plane and followed Him with a degree of sadness in my heart.

Then, last Friday morning after being here nearly three months, I got the news: Grandpa Clark had died.  I knew it would happen, and I knew it would be sooner than later, but it still came as a blow.  I sobbed.  I ached for the loss itself, and also for the separation of an ocean as I attempted to grieve in isolation from the rest of my family.  I'm still aching because of this.  My grandpa is gone, I won't be at the funeral, and trying to grieve from afar has proven to be an odd experience at best.  I long to go home, to just be there and participate in the communal grieving with my family and also the celebration of a long life well lived.

But alas, I am here in Kenya and going home is not an option for several reasons.  And so I am grieving from here and trying to stay connected with my family as best as I can.  Friday was a rough day, and by the end I decided to take a bath to soothe my aching muscles.  As I sat in the hot water and thought about my grandpa, I penned a poem in my head.  It allowed me to put into words what I'd been feeling all day:

Knowing that the end was near

reflecting on the past

Watching, waiting, wondering

and then he breathed his last

Hearing from across the world

of his ascent to glory

Now we know the final chapter

of my grandpa's story

Grieving nearly all alone

far from those gathered near

Weeping for the painful loss

of a man held dear

Longing to go home again

and grieve collectively

To cry within a realm

of familiarity

Aching from the struggle

of what we've sacrificed

Clinging to the promise

of the hope we have in Christ

Knowing that the end was near

reflecting on our call

Submitting to the One who knows

the cost of giving all

What we have sacrificed is real, but it's a fraction of what Christ Himself gave up for us.  He has led by example and asks that we follow Him.  May any degree of sadness accompanied with counting the cost never be enough to keep us from faithfully following Him anyway!

Shortly after the rich young man went away sad, Jesus said this: "And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother [or grandfather or grandmother] or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life" (Matthew 19:29).  That is our promise, and that is what I'm clinging to in these days of grieving and reflecting half a world away.

Grandma and Grandpa Clark with Asa last Christmas

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We invite your prayers for us and our family during this time.  My grandparents' 70th anniversary is today, June 21, and Grandpa desperately wanted to make it to this day of celebration but was five days short.  The visitation will be held today instead, with the funeral tomorrow morning.